I knit Keagan a blanket (my first attempt at anything larger than a dishcloth, and it actually looked pretty decent) and I wrote her a letter. I’d been toying with the idea of posting it and finally decided I would. So here it is, my letter to my lovely little niece:

Dear Keagan,

You’re finally here! We’ve all been waiting what seems like forever for you to come, and now that you’re here we all feel compelled to give you presents (and this will happen with great regularity because people LOVE to spoil cute babies).

My present is in the paper grocery bag along with your parent’s Supernatural CD. I would have wrapped it in something fancier, but Canada Post seems to know when you do things up nicely and then they drop your parcel in a puddle.

Anyway, my gift is a blanket that I knit for you. It’s pretty big considering how small you are. And given the heat wave going on in Ottawa, you probably won’t need it right away, but it will be handy come winter as a lap blanket or car-seat liner.

Here’s the really cool part about this blanket though – it’s not just some boring practical gift like socks or underwear, it’s actually a magical gift.

I know, I wouldn’t believe me either normally, but this really is a magical blanket.

Here are some of the uses I’ve discovered so far:

1. It makes a very comfortable flying carpet. That being said, if you’re off gallivanting in the Himalaya’s, do NOT let any yeti you meet use it. Yetis shed like mad and their hair is really hard to wash out – and this is a very washable flying carpet. Also, if some old guy in Cairo with a red hat and a cane offers you a bag of so-called ‘magic beans’ as trade for the carpet – say no and walk away. He’s a crafty one.
2. A very warm superhero cape. You’ll want to build up to really heroic feats though. Rescue a kitten in a tree a few times first and then maybe move on to rescuing folks in evil secret lairs. Lots of heroes think they can just start out big, but really, it’s like any other job – you start small, learn the ropes and work your way up. You’ll also find this cape great for rescuing people who got trapped in the Alps because they thought it would be fun to re-enact The Sound of Music. Try not to judge them too harshly, they can’t help being that stupid.
3. A small, but cozy, teddy bear fort. You’ll need two sticks and some string too, which I didn’t include because Canada Post won’t let me mail sticks. Something about them being a dirty safety hazard. Absolute rot in my opinion. If any of your bears start making lame excuses about needing to use the blanket to protect them from monsters, give them the blanket anyway; then follow them when they all sneak off to the annual Teddy Bear’s Picnic. You won’t taste better honey or sweets anywhere and the blanket does a fine job of keeping curious ants out of the custard.
4. DO NOT let your parents know about this one! This is secret information I’m about to divulge. Now, this blanket’s most useful magic is its ability to hide things. You’ll discover that hiding stuff under your bed when you’re told to “clean up that pig-pen you call a bedroom” will drive your parents absolutely wild. I could never see the big fuss either, I mean it’s all in one spot and easy to find right? Parents lose their minds over this sort of clear-headed logic

So, when you’re cleaning up, stuff everything under the bed as usual, and then put the blanket over the stuff. The blanket will create the illusion that there is nothing there – it’ll blend itself and all your things right into the floor.

That’s a very handy trick if you like collecting snakes, snails, rocks, cute toads or sticks and other things that destroy vacuum cleaners and make mothers shriek like old tea kettles. Trust me on this, I know.

That’s all I’ve discovered so far about the blanket, let me know if you find any new uses for it!

Welcome to the world little Firefly – I’ll try and visit just as soon as I possibly can.

Love,

Auntie R.

(and Uncle Joe too, though, he was no help at all with the knitting)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6XAPnuFjJc

The whole book was an excellent read, but what really grabbed my attention is the concept of the Results-only Work Environment (ROWE).

Let’s compare and contrast:

Typical office workplace:

• Must be present during “core business hours”.
• Must fill in time sheets to record all work activities – sometimes in excruciating detail.
• Must attend all meetings – even if they will not be useful to your work in anyway.
• Socializing with other employees is not encouraged except for company sponsored “team building” exercises.
• Managerial “babysitters” whose purpose seems to be ensuring you’re there and working.
• Personal or professional development is encouraged so long as you do it outside of work hours.
• Flex-time is available, but it’s not really that flexible. You must still work a 40 hour week and account for all your time.
• Yearly evaluations from people you don’t work with on a daily basis to set meaningless, buzzword filled goals.

ROWE workplace:

• Must get the work done and it must be good quality – when and where you do it doesn’t matter.
• Meetings are for collaborating on or discussing something – no meetings just for the sake of having one.
• Employees can do great work on their own terms.
• Pays employees fairly so they can a) take care of themselves and their families properly without a lot of stress and b) stop worrying about who’s making what and get on with creating something great.

I know which model I prefer.

Does it work for all businesses – yes. Say you have a retail store, it will be open during what is considered “core business hours” generally speaking. It will also likely provide a service or product – and you can still let your employees direct themselves. People who aren’t comfortable on the cash register can work the floor and help people. Employees with a creative eye can set up enticing displays, the diplomats among them can deal with unhappy or difficult customers. And of course, money won’t be an issue with them at work, because you pay them fairly.

I wonder though if the old and stale model is still around because we keep dressing it up with fancy concepts. For instance, let’s look at software companies that use an Agile development process. Agile is meant to stop treating software development like a car-factory (the waterfall method) and let self-directed, cross-functional teams build software in short cycles. This allows for better collaboration and visibility and when done correctly, you have a small piece of working software that could potentially be released to a customer for immediate feedback.

Agile is a fantastic concept and a great environment to work in when done right; otherwise, it’s simply another buzzword used to make the company sound innovative and interesting to people who don’t work there. I have worked at such places – and after the initial excitement of forward momentum, there comes a screeching halt and a feeling of confused betrayal. It seemed like we were moving forward, things were changing, the old ways were being dismantled so new growth and ideas could flourish. But really, it was just a new coat of paint on the same old tired structure. Like lipstick on a pig is the phrase that comes to mind.

When something that should have been great turns out to be riddled with problems and mediocre at best  – people lose heart, become unhappy, demotivated and even angry. This is when people spend their lunch hours surfing Workopolis and cleaning up their resume. This is where employee turnover happens.

Daniel Pink points out that as children we are self-directed, curious and will work at something just for pleasure – but we lose this once we start school or working and we start doing things only because we have to and for the dubious reward of a gold star or a cash bonus at work. We become uninspired people merely collecting  rewards we won’t enjoy.

My goal is to get back to that curious and motivated state. I know I can’t be five again, but I wonder what things I might think up if I just explored what was around me, read more, wrote more and rather than feeling humiliated by my failures, used them as new opportunities.

We need to free ourselves from these schedules and time-sheets and silly carrot-and-stick systems and just engage with the work we’re doing – no matter what that work is. We need time and space to create new ideas and try new things – and this time and freedom could lead to truly innovative ideas that advance our thinking, our way of working and the work itself.

I’ve read all these concepts before and thought “What cheesy, new-agey sounding crap this all is.” But I was wrong to think that – not wrong because I know for a fact this approach won’t work for me, but wrong because I’ve never bothered to try it before.

That changes now.

Here’s the fine print and rules and all that:

• Link to your original tagger and list these rules in your post.
• Share 7 facts about yourself in the post.
• Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names and links to their blogs.
• Let them know they’ve been tagged.

Seven facts about me:

1. I enjoy getting these “all about me” sort of memes. Where else is it so acceptable and even expected to talk about yourself incessantly. I don’t know too many people who truly hate talking about themselves and these let you rattle on and on!
2. I enjoy cleaning messy things – stoves, bathrooms, bedrooms…whatever. I like seeing things well organized and clean. It gives me warm fuzzies that are second only to putting on warm socks fresh out of the dryer.
3. I am usually pretty generous with my things except for popcorn and books. I DO NOT share popcorn. Period. Get your own and keep your greedy eyes away from mine. I will share my books, but I am the nastiest librarian ever. When I say I want that book back in exactly the same condition I lent it out in – I really mean it.
4. I have an absolute horror of being late for things. If we’re meeting at 6 for dinner, you can bet I was in the neighbourhood at 5 (and sitting in nearby coffee shop checking my watch obsessively) and I will be no less than 15 minutes early for our date.
5. My book collection is organized like Chapters. Children’s books in one section, classic literature in another etc. I tried putting them on the shelves in alphabetical order by author, but I could never find anything. I expect to find Dickens and Austen keeping company and that my collection of hard cover Twilight books will be in general fiction.
6. Which leads to…I liked the Twilight books. No, I do not have any shame. I mean sure, they are silly and obsessive and even creepy at times – but the 16 year old girl in me LOVED them! The adult I was supposed to become thinks they’re ridiculous, but I never listen to her much anyway.
7. I believe that being a kid for the rest of my life is an honourable aspiration. It allows me to still believe in things I can’t see, own crayons and a couple of colouring books, play with toys when I’m feeling silly and adore cartoons. Plus, I still think that Sugar Crisp cereal with chocolate milk is fantastic!

Now for the dreaded tagging – but you don’t have to participate if you don’t want to (or Pan got to you first):

• The DailyDish – because now that she’s moved and got her pretty blue garbage bags out for collection, I feel OK about being nosy.
• Nate – anyone who can write about Guitar Hero as science is someone I need to know more stuff about.
• Lens Impressions – I’m hoping she’ll write one on Waldi’s behalf because honestly, that dog is ridiculously adorable. And I want photos too.
• Romi – I’m just nosy – her site is more entertaining than People magazine and her facts will be hilarious.
• Free and Flawed – She already shares lots about her life – but the public need to hear more is not so easily sated. Plus, she draws stick people too!
• CurlyWurlyGurly – Come oooonnnnn – all the cool kids are doing it!!

OK, that’s only six people, but I never said I would follow the rules.

However, I got out of the habit for a few weeks about 3 months ago and when I decided to start again, it seemed like I couldn’t draw stick people anymore.

How ridiculous is that? All they are is a circle and some lines! But that morning, it was all misshapen heads and uneven arms and squiggly bodies.

I felt really disheartened. It should be simple, it’s stick people. I’m good at stick people!

After about twenty minutes and several crumpled up sticky notes, it all came back. I watched my hand make nice circles and put reasonably expressive faces in them with proper bodies, arms, and legs.

I don’t claim to be an artist, but I really like drawing stick people. It’s fun and it’s a nice outlet; I’d have been pretty sad if my “talent” for drawing them had somehow evaporated.

Plus, Sticky Note Friday would be a total bust without the sticky notes.

Oh, and “Zqajekx” is the Aztec word for “big, dirty cheater”.

You know who you are.

I blame my sister, Allison, for giving me full access to her workout playlist.

The video is pretty amusing too!

Here is my entry:

Pretty scary don’t you think?

P.S.: It’s supposed to be a scary tree. Really.

And no, this vindictive little slice of bread did not get his wish.

ChoreWars is a sort of RPG that makes doing boring chores a fun game. You can claim experience points (XP) and get gold and treasures for doing mundane tasks like washing the dishes and you may even get to battle a monster!

If I had kids – this is exactly the sort of method I’d use for getting them involved in keeping their rooms tidy and helping wash up after dinner. As the Dungeon Master (DM) you can determine the chores, the treasures and the monsters all to your own liking.

This is a great way to see who’s pulling their weight around the house and to reward the people that do (maybe 500 gold pieces in the game could equal $5 in real life?).

I can indulge my love of all things geeky and get “rewards” for chores I was going to do anyway.

There is a great scene where Jane and Kevin are dancing on the bar in some dive singing along to Benny and the Jets by Elton John.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NyJ5A36uTA

I nearly peed my pants when Jane sings the line “…she’s got electric boobs…”. I was thrilled to discover that someone else had misheard that line in exactly the way I had misheard that line.

Never mind the worn out “…excuse me, while I kiss this guy…” stuff – electric boobs are WAY funnier.

I’ve misheard lots of song lyrics – but this one is my favourite. What song lyrics have you misheard?

Bonus points to those of you who have sung the wrong lyrics in public!