Category — consumer culture

I’m not sure why I thought of this old Clearasil commercial today, but I did.

This just seemed to naturally follow:

I am participating in CurlyWurlyGurly’s theme posting challenge for June: The WORST candy in the history of mankind has to be Hershey’s Eat-More bar.

The Eat-More bar is supposedly a “chewy dark toffee, peanut and chocolate” bar. But what you never hear about is how these bars are made – well, I am spilling my guts to the world now. No more secrets! This is how Eat-More is manufactured:

1. Go to work at candy bar factory.
2. Pick up random bits of toffee, peanuts and chocolate on the bottom of your boots.
3. Scrape boots off into the Eat-More bucket at the end of your shift.
4. Grave-yard shift workers press it into bars and sell it.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s an economical and environmentally friendly method for making candy, but even if their boots are clean; do you really want to eat candy that was on the floor? This defies the five second rule and is, quite frankly, unhygienic.

I did try to get a picture of it, but it sensed my great dislike for it and would not allow me to take its photo. All the photos were blurred and in one, I’m fairly certain I saw a cluster of peanut bits shaped like Satan. But, I am not one to disappoint my readers and I discovered the Candy Blog has a very nice and in-focus photo of it.

Besides which, the candy looks rather like a shiny turd with peanut bits embedded in it and this is a G rated blog. Someone has to think of the children.

My father would tell me I am a cretin for not loving these bars. He claims they are tasty, they keep the mail moving (though how that much sugar translates into fibre I will never know) and the number one reason to love Eat-More bars (according to dear old Dad) is folding the wrapper like so:

I tried eating a little piece of the bar – after all I have broadened my horizons somewhat since I was 7 years old – but, my refined adult palate wholeheartedly rejected the candy and went running straight into the arms of a 3 Musketeers bar.

Dad, if you’re reading this, I’m sure it’s Mum’s faulty genes that dictate my hatred for this candy. I still like beer if that helps.

Kiss Catcher couples pillowcases. Made of pure awesome.

I was wandering down West Broadway here in Vancouver after doing some shopping with a friend and I noticed Twoo – a fabulous and funky little place that sells stick people art, jewelry and glassware, Kimmidolls and all sorts of neat little things.

I went in – how could I not?

I talked with the owner about how cool stick people are (because let’s face it they are pretty cool) and mentioned this website which he had a look at right away. He liked my stick people enough to say “You should make some cards and bring them here and see if they sell.” I was so excited I nearly did the Happy Dance right there.

It never occurred to me, not seriously anyway, that anyone might actually pay real money to buy something I drew. So there it is, I’m going to make up a dozen nice cards with my goofy stick people on them and see what happens.

It has always been my dream to get paid to draw stick people (well, second only to my dream of getting paid to play video games and goof off) and yesterday might be a small beginning in that direction.

If it goes well, maybe I’ll start an Etsy page and people can buy from there and even request custom drawn stick people that look or talk like people they know!

In the meantime, while I get my stick people mojo flowing, check out Twoo and support stick people! If you’re in Vancouver check out Twoo in person at 252 West Broadway.